I Saw the Devil

Has your lady love been brutally murdered by some sick fuck who didn’t even have the decency to give her a painless death before hacking her to pieces? Do you want to avenge her in the most efficient, stylish manner but don’t know how? Have I got the right person for you! Meet Kim Soo-hyeon, a young Secret Service agent whose fiancee recently died in the same violent manner. His kick-ass vengeance lessons will feed the fire of your hatred and make the most hardened murderer cry for his mother when you’re done with him. All you need to do is watch the merciless Korean revenge movie I Saw the Devil, and maybe sign up for a gym membership after.

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My 2011 in Horror Movies

50 horror movies in 2011! Here are some of the best ones:

A Serbian Film (Serbia, 2010)
You think Martyrs was fucked up? I’m telling you, Martyrs is a fucking romantic comedy compared to A Serbian Film. Let me put it in perspective: someone was literally skullfucked and that is the least notable thing that happens in this movie. Without a doubt, this is the most horrifying thing I’ve seen in 2011 ever.

I told Lauren about it and she insisted on watching it on the eve of her 25th birthday. I made her cupcakes that night so I think she hated me a little less.

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The Horror Movies I Saw in 2011

I have a new year’s resolution I’d really like to keep: I am going to write a short review of every single horror movie I see in 2012. This will probably bite me in the ass as soon as work starts taking over my life, but at the end of the year I will probably be thankful for keeping such a faithful record of my horror movie viewings. I’m the most forgetful person in the world and it would be kind of nice if I had a list of all the scary shit I saw in the year that was, and revisit the movies I liked. Right now, the closest thing I have to that record is the downloaded torrents on my client; there is a reason why I am too lazy to clear the completed queue.

Meanwhile, let me make up for being such a bad horror fan with a short list of all horror movies I saw in 2011, in the order that I remember seeing them.

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Black Christmas 1974 (aka Silent Night Evil Night)

Work and life in general kept me from feeling the holiday spirit until Christmas eve, which meant that I only thought to curl up with a good Christmas horror movie after emerging from my annual Christmas day food coma. I have a couple of holiday horror flicks saved in my hard drive, and a quick search through IMDB made me decide to see Black Christmas (1974), aka Silent Night Evil Night. An hour and a half later I vowed to never let IMDB ratings influence my horror movie viewing decisions because it appears that everyone who gave Black Christmas glowing reviews have crappy tastes in movies.

Black Christmas starts off with a pretty sexy premise: a sorority house is terrorized by creepy anonymous phone calls over the holiday break. One by one, sorority girls start disappearing from the house, and the police only start taking the disappearances seriously when they find a 13-year-old girl murdered in the park. The police set up a wire tap on the house’s phone, thinking that the distressing phone calls might be related to the disappearances and murders, but will they uncover the caller’s identity in time to prevent more sorority girls from vanishing? Dun dun dunnnnnn.

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Christmas Horror Flicks

Who says horror movies are only for Halloween? Here are 12 horror flicks, one for each of the 12 days of Christmas:

Merry Christmas, fellow horror nuts!

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